So today, on the way home, I was happily driving along while mentally planning the rest of the day. I was checking stuff off my list, la di da, and thought "Get home, go to the loo, put Janaya down for a nap and then I so need a break!!!"
And then I felt this strange breeze as I turn into the street nearest my house.
I look back and... Janaya's managed to pull her arms out of the seat belt, leaned forward and OPENED THE CAR DOOR!!!!!!
Man, my heart was in my throat as I dived out of the car, ran around to her side, told her of for the FIRST time ever, and locked the door before closing it.
She cried :( It was awful and I felt terrible, but my God, she scared the life out of me!!!!!!
I will NEVER forget to lock her door again!!!!!
Friday, October 2, 2009
Monday, September 21, 2009
Didn't your mother ever tell you not to play with your food???
Apparently she missed that memo! LoL
I just glanced up at Miss J as she sat in her highchair eating her dinner, and had to do a double take.
Okay, background!
We had pasta for dinner tonight... the tubey kind, or "penne" as I was informed by a dear, dear, (way too smart) friend of mine! ;)
So, instead of actually picking up the pasta and eating it, Miss J decided to put one tube on each index finger! Edward Scissorhands? LoL
People I grew up with used cheesels in much the same way, but we were much older! LoL I was pretty impressed to see Miss J "painting" her highchair with her pasta-fingers!
I just glanced up at Miss J as she sat in her highchair eating her dinner, and had to do a double take.
Okay, background!
We had pasta for dinner tonight... the tubey kind, or "penne" as I was informed by a dear, dear, (way too smart) friend of mine! ;)
So, instead of actually picking up the pasta and eating it, Miss J decided to put one tube on each index finger! Edward Scissorhands? LoL
People I grew up with used cheesels in much the same way, but we were much older! LoL I was pretty impressed to see Miss J "painting" her highchair with her pasta-fingers!
Friday, September 18, 2009
Sleep Matters
***Warning, A LONG post***
What is wrong with me? What am I doing wrong?
Khaldun has been screaming since 10pm – that’s for over the last two hours! I have NO idea what is wrong with him. I’ve checked for all the usual – too hot, too cold, nappy, teething etc and nothing seems to calm him.
If I get him up out of the cot he’ll settle for a few mins after which I’ll put him back into the cot. And then the screaming starts again. If I stand there and rub his back or tummy until he has quietened, the moment I stop, the screaming starts again. If I just sit by his cot, he will not stay lying down – he’ll scream and stand up and shake the side of the crib. it’s not good enough for me to be just near him! If I lay him down and give him his toy, pull the blankets up to his shoulders and tell him firmly “It’s time for sleep” and then walk out of the room, closing the door most of the way behind me, the screaming starts before I have even exited the room. If I lay him down and give him his lion, pull the blankets up to his shoulders and not say anything at all, then leave the room closing the door most of the way behind me, same result. I don’t understand.
I’ve even tried the controlled crying technique (in the past as well as tonight)… sort of. I hate hearing him cry and can’t bear to let him cry for longer than 10 mins without me going in there to try and settle him.
I just don’t know what else to do!
I feel so helpless right now. And I know the depression does affect the way I feel about and see things. I know that it colours everything that I do, say, think about. But this rubs really raw for what I believe to be a good reason!
You see, up until Khaldun was 6 months old, he was a FANTASTIC sleeper. And stupid me contributed this to me learning my lesson from my experiences with ICE when she was a baby.
Apparently not.
When I was pregnant with Isys, I was induced a month early for various reasons – my blood pressure was sky-rocketing and Isys had actually stopped growing properly from about 32weeks, IUGR (Inter-uterine Growth Restriction) is the term I think that was applied.
So she was born at 36w3d and due to poor feeding, jaundice, and continually losing weight rather than gaining after the initial loss, we were kept in the hospital for 12 days after she was born.
Once she and I were home, we were instructed that we must keep a strict 3hourly feeding schedule. But she was soooo slow at feeding that by the time she finished a feed it was almost time to start the next feed! And it was for this reason that we kept her in the bed with us of a night time – so that I could get some semblance of sleep.
And while it served a purpose at the time, when it came apparent that it was time that she moved into her own bed (around about 1) it proved to be the worst thing we could have done. She didn’t want to sleep in her own bed. And who could blame her when she was so cosy with mum and dad?
The trouble we had getting her to go to sleep in the cot was horrendous. We endured copious amounts of rocking, patting, sitting near the cot, letting her fall asleep while feeding (then trying to transport her to the cot still asleep, did not work very often either). She never got to sleep before Midnight and the routine took over two hours before she got to sleep – on a good night! I spent many nights asleep on the floor, where I’d be laying while reaching up to pat her back and had fallen asleep out of sheer exhaustion. In fact, it got to the point where I actually put a mattress on the floor beside her cot in anticipation of this occurring!
During the day I held her a lot. Fed her to sleep and generally kept her close to me all the time (Boy was the separation anxiety intense when I first started having to put her into day care!). She never went in her cot whilst she was awake.
Back then, and even now, we did not believe in the controlled crying method of getting babies to go to sleep. I can’t bear to hear babies cry, it wrenches my heart out. I thought it was cruel to leave a baby cry it’s little lungs out for long periods of time.
But it got to the point where we just had to try it. I wasn’t getting any QUALITY sleep and life was starting take on a tinted film. We adapted the method to suit us – we never let her cry for longer than 10 minutes and once the crying escalated into distress we went straight in, whether the time limit had elapsed or not.
And Isys surprised us by accepting that we put her to bed and left the room straight away, none of the rigmarole was going to be endured. In fact she accepted this in just 2 nights!! I couldn’t believe it at the time! And all I could think of was, why didn’t we try this earlier?!?!?!
She still didn’t go to bed before midnight, but at the time we took that. I was a night owl anyway and the fact that we didn’t have to take 2hrs to get her to bed was fantastic. She still slept until late, normally 9-10am, and had her naps, so I wasn’t worried about her not getting enough sleep. Once this new routine was well and truly established (about a month later) we started putting her to bed earlier and earlier. And now she goes to bed around about 8-8:30pm most nights. And it will be earlier again once she stops having her afternoon naps.
So anyway, I told you all this because I wanted to really show you how we’ve learnt from our experiences.
When Khaldun came along, we had him in a bassinette beside our bed. He has slept in our bed twice in the last year.
Once he got too big for the bassinette – about 4months – we transitioned him to the cot in his own room, which he took to fine.
I don’t feed him to sleep. We had the whole feed, play, sleep routine down pat. I was quite able to put him in either the cot or the bassinette while he was still awake and leave the room without any hassle. I didn’t go into him straight away when he cried so he learnt to self-settle. I don’t hold him all the time, although we still enjoy PLENTY of cuddles and kisses and playtime.
I was quite proud of the way we had managed to change the way we did things and as a result of those changes, we had a baby who was a terrific little sleeper.
Until 6 months of age.
And then it all went out the window. It’s like someone snuck in during night while I was asleep and switched babies with me!
Now, when I leave the room, most nights he cries. Fortunately after about 10-15mins of crying he will go to sleep by himself. This will normally involve me usually just lying him back down if he has been sitting up and pulling the covers up over him then leaving the room maybe once or twice.
During the night he now wakes up numerous times and will not self-settle. I am required to go in and settle him back to sleep. Usually this takes about 10secs.
And then there are the nights where he will cry for hours before finally going to sleep for the night (like tonight). He will still wake up numerous times through-out the night, which again requires me to settle him. Thankfully this happens maybe once every 7-10days. But it leaves me feeling completely helpless.
And then there are the nights where he has absolutely NO drama’s going to bed – no crying or anything, straight to sleep. But will wake up at around 3am and will proceed to scream for hours on end whether I am there with him or not. And those nights are the worst. Not only am I tired from only having a few hours sleep, but I’m desperate to try to settle him so that he doesn’t wake my daughter or husband. And not being able to settle a crying baby has to be one of the worst things a mother/father can ever go through! It’s very demoralising for me. These types of nights are occurring more and more often.
So I guess my problem is, what the hell am I doing wrong? We still employ all of the techniques with Khaldun that we have right from the start, nothing has changed there. But it just doesn’t seem to matter.
We are doing all the “right” things and we still have a baby that doesn’t sleep well. It just makes me feel totally useless as a mother.
Any advice you may have would be soooo appreciated right now
What is wrong with me? What am I doing wrong?
Khaldun has been screaming since 10pm – that’s for over the last two hours! I have NO idea what is wrong with him. I’ve checked for all the usual – too hot, too cold, nappy, teething etc and nothing seems to calm him.
If I get him up out of the cot he’ll settle for a few mins after which I’ll put him back into the cot. And then the screaming starts again. If I stand there and rub his back or tummy until he has quietened, the moment I stop, the screaming starts again. If I just sit by his cot, he will not stay lying down – he’ll scream and stand up and shake the side of the crib. it’s not good enough for me to be just near him! If I lay him down and give him his toy, pull the blankets up to his shoulders and tell him firmly “It’s time for sleep” and then walk out of the room, closing the door most of the way behind me, the screaming starts before I have even exited the room. If I lay him down and give him his lion, pull the blankets up to his shoulders and not say anything at all, then leave the room closing the door most of the way behind me, same result. I don’t understand.
I’ve even tried the controlled crying technique (in the past as well as tonight)… sort of. I hate hearing him cry and can’t bear to let him cry for longer than 10 mins without me going in there to try and settle him.
I just don’t know what else to do!
I feel so helpless right now. And I know the depression does affect the way I feel about and see things. I know that it colours everything that I do, say, think about. But this rubs really raw for what I believe to be a good reason!
You see, up until Khaldun was 6 months old, he was a FANTASTIC sleeper. And stupid me contributed this to me learning my lesson from my experiences with ICE when she was a baby.
Apparently not.
When I was pregnant with Isys, I was induced a month early for various reasons – my blood pressure was sky-rocketing and Isys had actually stopped growing properly from about 32weeks, IUGR (Inter-uterine Growth Restriction) is the term I think that was applied.
So she was born at 36w3d and due to poor feeding, jaundice, and continually losing weight rather than gaining after the initial loss, we were kept in the hospital for 12 days after she was born.
Once she and I were home, we were instructed that we must keep a strict 3hourly feeding schedule. But she was soooo slow at feeding that by the time she finished a feed it was almost time to start the next feed! And it was for this reason that we kept her in the bed with us of a night time – so that I could get some semblance of sleep.
And while it served a purpose at the time, when it came apparent that it was time that she moved into her own bed (around about 1) it proved to be the worst thing we could have done. She didn’t want to sleep in her own bed. And who could blame her when she was so cosy with mum and dad?
The trouble we had getting her to go to sleep in the cot was horrendous. We endured copious amounts of rocking, patting, sitting near the cot, letting her fall asleep while feeding (then trying to transport her to the cot still asleep, did not work very often either). She never got to sleep before Midnight and the routine took over two hours before she got to sleep – on a good night! I spent many nights asleep on the floor, where I’d be laying while reaching up to pat her back and had fallen asleep out of sheer exhaustion. In fact, it got to the point where I actually put a mattress on the floor beside her cot in anticipation of this occurring!
During the day I held her a lot. Fed her to sleep and generally kept her close to me all the time (Boy was the separation anxiety intense when I first started having to put her into day care!). She never went in her cot whilst she was awake.
Back then, and even now, we did not believe in the controlled crying method of getting babies to go to sleep. I can’t bear to hear babies cry, it wrenches my heart out. I thought it was cruel to leave a baby cry it’s little lungs out for long periods of time.
But it got to the point where we just had to try it. I wasn’t getting any QUALITY sleep and life was starting take on a tinted film. We adapted the method to suit us – we never let her cry for longer than 10 minutes and once the crying escalated into distress we went straight in, whether the time limit had elapsed or not.
And Isys surprised us by accepting that we put her to bed and left the room straight away, none of the rigmarole was going to be endured. In fact she accepted this in just 2 nights!! I couldn’t believe it at the time! And all I could think of was, why didn’t we try this earlier?!?!?!
She still didn’t go to bed before midnight, but at the time we took that. I was a night owl anyway and the fact that we didn’t have to take 2hrs to get her to bed was fantastic. She still slept until late, normally 9-10am, and had her naps, so I wasn’t worried about her not getting enough sleep. Once this new routine was well and truly established (about a month later) we started putting her to bed earlier and earlier. And now she goes to bed around about 8-8:30pm most nights. And it will be earlier again once she stops having her afternoon naps.
So anyway, I told you all this because I wanted to really show you how we’ve learnt from our experiences.
When Khaldun came along, we had him in a bassinette beside our bed. He has slept in our bed twice in the last year.
Once he got too big for the bassinette – about 4months – we transitioned him to the cot in his own room, which he took to fine.
I don’t feed him to sleep. We had the whole feed, play, sleep routine down pat. I was quite able to put him in either the cot or the bassinette while he was still awake and leave the room without any hassle. I didn’t go into him straight away when he cried so he learnt to self-settle. I don’t hold him all the time, although we still enjoy PLENTY of cuddles and kisses and playtime.
I was quite proud of the way we had managed to change the way we did things and as a result of those changes, we had a baby who was a terrific little sleeper.
Until 6 months of age.
And then it all went out the window. It’s like someone snuck in during night while I was asleep and switched babies with me!
Now, when I leave the room, most nights he cries. Fortunately after about 10-15mins of crying he will go to sleep by himself. This will normally involve me usually just lying him back down if he has been sitting up and pulling the covers up over him then leaving the room maybe once or twice.
During the night he now wakes up numerous times and will not self-settle. I am required to go in and settle him back to sleep. Usually this takes about 10secs.
And then there are the nights where he will cry for hours before finally going to sleep for the night (like tonight). He will still wake up numerous times through-out the night, which again requires me to settle him. Thankfully this happens maybe once every 7-10days. But it leaves me feeling completely helpless.
And then there are the nights where he has absolutely NO drama’s going to bed – no crying or anything, straight to sleep. But will wake up at around 3am and will proceed to scream for hours on end whether I am there with him or not. And those nights are the worst. Not only am I tired from only having a few hours sleep, but I’m desperate to try to settle him so that he doesn’t wake my daughter or husband. And not being able to settle a crying baby has to be one of the worst things a mother/father can ever go through! It’s very demoralising for me. These types of nights are occurring more and more often.
So I guess my problem is, what the hell am I doing wrong? We still employ all of the techniques with Khaldun that we have right from the start, nothing has changed there. But it just doesn’t seem to matter.
We are doing all the “right” things and we still have a baby that doesn’t sleep well. It just makes me feel totally useless as a mother.
Any advice you may have would be soooo appreciated right now
Wednesday, September 16, 2009
Stupid FB Quizzes
If you have a FB account you will have undoubtedly completed a quiz that promised to tell you all manner of things by answering a few simple questions. From the exact day you will die, and how it will happen, to how many children you will have, the gender of said children and even their date of births. Then there are the quizzes which asks you what State you should live in, what random object represents you, you’re favourite se.x position (because a quiz can actually know your preferences right???), what celebrity we most resemble and even what mental illness we have or the type of serial killer we are like.
Now, I know most of you take these quizzes knowing that the questions and answers do not mean ANYTHING at all, that half of the time the questions do even have anything to do with the topic of the quiz. But we take them anyway, out of curiosity maybe, or for fun, from boredom, procrastination, a myriad of reasons.
I came across a quiz today. Apparently Fortune Teller Genius “knows everything” and will answer you with a “yes” or “no” to any question that you ask of him.
So, what do I do? I ask him a question. Why not? I know it’s a load of bull crap. And yet, I wasn’t prepared for his answer, even though I knew I had a 50% chance of receiving it. Logically, I knew this. I’m a smart person.
I looked at the answer and I felt a dull ache in the pit of my stomach. I also thought that maybe this answer may actually be true.
So I bet you are all wondering what I asked. Or not. But I'll share anyway.
Fortune Teller Genius
Question: Will i ever be happy?
Answer: Of course not!
Will I ever get this monkey off my back?
Now, I know most of you take these quizzes knowing that the questions and answers do not mean ANYTHING at all, that half of the time the questions do even have anything to do with the topic of the quiz. But we take them anyway, out of curiosity maybe, or for fun, from boredom, procrastination, a myriad of reasons.
I came across a quiz today. Apparently Fortune Teller Genius “knows everything” and will answer you with a “yes” or “no” to any question that you ask of him.
So, what do I do? I ask him a question. Why not? I know it’s a load of bull crap. And yet, I wasn’t prepared for his answer, even though I knew I had a 50% chance of receiving it. Logically, I knew this. I’m a smart person.
I looked at the answer and I felt a dull ache in the pit of my stomach. I also thought that maybe this answer may actually be true.
So I bet you are all wondering what I asked. Or not. But I'll share anyway.
Fortune Teller Genius
Question: Will i ever be happy?
Answer: Of course not!
Will I ever get this monkey off my back?
No More Dummy!
Well, this happened a little bit sooner then what I was planning...but things never go to plan in my house.
Last night Jaci went to sleep WITHOUT her Dummy. I was completely shocked, although we checked for around half an hour before bedtime to find the dummy, we just couldn't find it anywhere. It was so cute, she was walking around the house holding her hands up as if to say 'all gone'.
In the end it didn't take long for her to drift off to sleep, she just layed down in my arms and cuddled in close and off she went into the 'land of nod'. Today we haven't needed the dummy (even though it is still lost) and she has been quite good without it.
So we now have No More Dummy!
Last night Jaci went to sleep WITHOUT her Dummy. I was completely shocked, although we checked for around half an hour before bedtime to find the dummy, we just couldn't find it anywhere. It was so cute, she was walking around the house holding her hands up as if to say 'all gone'.
In the end it didn't take long for her to drift off to sleep, she just layed down in my arms and cuddled in close and off she went into the 'land of nod'. Today we haven't needed the dummy (even though it is still lost) and she has been quite good without it.
So we now have No More Dummy!
Tuesday, September 15, 2009
About Me and My Family!
My name is Stephanie Tattam and I am married to my darling husband Lee Tattam. Together we have four children. I am 26 years old and Lee is 32 years old, we have been married for 4 years and have been together for 9 years. Our children are...Tyler Jordan Tattam, born March 16th 2001, he is 8 years old, next is Zach Ahren Tattam, born August 15th 2003, he has just turned 6 years old, then we have Bailey Amber June Tattam, born 29th November 2004, she is 4 years old, Last but not least we have Jaci Fay Tattam, born 7th January 2008, she is 20-months old.
So thats our Family
So thats our Family
OH MY GOSH!
Well, this afternoon I got the shock of my life. I had bathed Jaci and dressed her in her PJ's, and I left the bath water in the bath and then closed the bathroom door. Finished off Dinner and fed the kids, then told Bailey to have a bath. She (Bailey) came out and said she was getting in and I aked her to close the door behind her so Jaci didn't go into the bathroom.
So, I'm out in the dining room starting to clean up after dinner and then sorting some washing out, when Zach comes out and says "Jaci is in the bathtub". I immediately freaked out, I know that the older kids are okay to bath themselves but I always ask them to close the door so Jaci can't get in the bathroom. I walk into the bathroom to find my 20-month old toddler, standing in the bathtub (with water up to her ankles) in her PJ's and Slippers and playing with a Facewasher, while giggling at Bailey who is also in the bathtub.
In the end it was a change of PJ's for Jaci, Bailey got yelled at for leaving the bathroom door open and now I have learnt a lesson to never trust the 'older kids' to do something you ask them to do.Never has this happened before and now after this afternoon, hopefully it won't again.
So, I'm out in the dining room starting to clean up after dinner and then sorting some washing out, when Zach comes out and says "Jaci is in the bathtub". I immediately freaked out, I know that the older kids are okay to bath themselves but I always ask them to close the door so Jaci can't get in the bathroom. I walk into the bathroom to find my 20-month old toddler, standing in the bathtub (with water up to her ankles) in her PJ's and Slippers and playing with a Facewasher, while giggling at Bailey who is also in the bathtub.
In the end it was a change of PJ's for Jaci, Bailey got yelled at for leaving the bathroom door open and now I have learnt a lesson to never trust the 'older kids' to do something you ask them to do.Never has this happened before and now after this afternoon, hopefully it won't again.
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